I think that it is safe to assume that for most of you, criticism hurts. It's hard to hear words of criticism from people you might never meet. It is probably harder to hear criticism from a trusted friend. It's important to note that there are times we need to listen and pay attention to things that others might say that we may not like. You don't really have to pay attention to the things the people you have never met have to say, but the things that people say who knows us best, like a group of friends, a boyfriend or girlfriend, coaches, and even parents. If you have a trusted friend tell you that it is best that you don't do something because it will negatively affect you down the road, then you should probably not do it and listen to them without taking offense. When a friend gives you the straight up hard truth it stings a bit, but its better to deal with a bruised ego than a lifetime of regret. If you think about it, the people who know you you best may see our circumstances with more clarity than we do. Honestly, we all need those friends in our lives because we all need help.
Proverbs 27:5-6 tells us, "Better is open rebuke than love that is concealed. Faithful are the wounds of a friend, but deceitful are the kisses of the enemy."
When the people around you question what you say or do, it is important to understand their character as well.
Ask yourself, are they coming from a place of sincerity and love? What are their intentions? Are they saying something that will benefit them in some way? Or are they truly looking out for my best interests?
It's about discernment, the ability to differentiate between who is supportive, loving, and telling you the truth and who is not. I know that in my life, I know that my closest of friends truly want what's best for me. They have been there over and over again for me. They have told me that when they want to talk to me about something that it is hard for them, they don't always know what to say, but they something. I think you get to that point of maturity too where you know which people in your life truly want what is best for you and will whole heartily help you get to that point.
Sometimes the hard truth needs to be told, whether you are doing the telling or someone else it telling you. When the hard truth is offered it will change your life for the better. It takes a lot of courage to have conversations with so much meaning and purpose behind them.
I understand that nobody wants to be judgmental, and nobody gets excited about having to tell a friend something that might initially hurt them but might make the person better for it. I am not good at it and telling the truth with love is something that I try to work on everyday. It is so important to affirm your love for that person before you bring the subject up, during the conversation, and when it's over. We must let our love for others be there reason they listen and the truth be the reason they change.
It really comes down to love. Do you love the people in your life enough to tell them the hard truth? And do you have the types of people in your life who want what is best for you. If you don't, I think it is time to watch who you surround yourself with.
~ don't be afraid, it's all out of love ~
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