Two are better than one

Two are better than one. I am hopeful that you have heard that before at some point in your life or during your walk with Christ. For those of you who might be reading something that I posted for the first time, I have been reading the book 'Living on The Ragged Edge,' by Charles R. Swindoll. I have referenced his work in a couple of my posts and I plan on doing the same with this post.

I opened up the book last night and the the title of chapter 9 was 'One Plus One Equals Survival.' I immediately was drawn to what this chapter was going to be about and looked forward to finding out what that chapter title meant. While I was reading through it last night, I felt like it was something that I wanted to use in my blog post today. Last night, I had my mind made up that I was going to post about it, and then this morning my mind changed for a bit. I was telling my girlfriend last night about what I read and what it meant that two are better than one. I told her how I was thankful for her because she is always there for me because that is what I need. She is my best friend, and encourages me in every circumstance. She also tells me that there is something that I do that isn't right. I am so thankful for that. (I could go on) When I was reading last night I underlined something that stuck out to me that the author said that I really liked. "I also have a small group of men who know me very well. They are trustworthy and confidential guys I really need. Why? Because I am weak and I need their counsel. Furthermore, I occasionally blow it. If you doubt that, take it by faith! I need those men to encourage me and, when necessary, to reprove me." Those words jumped off the page at me, because that is something I need and want in my life. I have my guys, and I love them, but our relationship is missing a couple of things. Accountability, vulnerability, and Christ. I am just going to be honest, what my relationship with my friends is missing is fruit. I long for friendships where fruit can be produced for the kingdom of heaven. Luckily, I have become disciplined enough where I don't need someone to hold me accountable for reading my bible, but I need some guys in my life that will bring fruit bearing relationships.

Why did I share that all? This morning I was having second thoughts about this blog topic. I was feeling like I was going to be a hypocrite. How could I encourage you with this topic and then not do a good job with it myself? Then the Spirit hit me and I realized that I was just trying to be attacked by Satan. I realized that he was scared and was going to deceive me to not address this topic. Satan likes when we are alone, that is when we are most vulnerable to sin and do things that we probably shouldn't. Where two or more gather in my name, there I will be with them right? Satan is just trying to claw his way in there because he doesn't stand a chance. He was already defeated. My mom used to tell me all the time that she believed the enemy was attacking her, or attacking me, my brother or even our family. I remember thinking, how does she always feel that! It used to blow my mind. Then I realized that once your relationship with Christ gets to a certain point and you feel God's presence all the time that it becomes easier to distinguish what God wants vs. how the enemy is trying to attack you.

Two are better than one 

Two are better than one because they have a good return for their labor. For if either of them falls, the one will lift up his companion. But woe to the one who falls when there is not another to lift him up. Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone? And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart. (Ecclesiastes 4:9-12)

As humans we are lonely. There are billions of people on this earth, yet we are still lonely. There are some common cries of the lonely and maybe you have heard them before.

1. Why don't people love me and help me get out of my problems?

2. If only others realized how difficult things are!

3. Nobody really cares! I am all alone in this!

There is an old Swedish motto that reads: "Shared joy is double joy, and shared sorrow is half a sorrow." As the motion says, the secret of survival is not simply enjoying life's little joys but enduring its sorrow, it is sharing bother with others.

The opening line of the scripture sets the stage: "two are better than one." I don't know about you, but  I always thought that this scripture was for married people. It would only make sense right? Nope! This passage if for people who are humans on this lonely earth wondering how to survive in our "dog-eat-dog" culture of ragged-edge reality. It is better to have someone along our side for the battle. We gain perspective by having somebody by our side. We gain objectivity and gain courage in tough situations.

Here is a poem from the book that explains why "two are better than one."

Oh, the comfort-the inexpressible comfort
of feeling safe with a person,
Having neither to weigh thoughts,
Nor measure words-but pouring them
All right out-just as they are-
Chaff and grain together-
Certain that a faithful hand will
Take and sift them-
Keep what is worth keeping-
And with the breath of kindness
Blow the rest away.

That poem might not make a ton of sense to you the first time you read it through...or the second.

After making the statement that, Solomon takes the time to explain why. He mentions three reasons: mutual encouragement when we are weak, mutual support when we are vulnerable, and mutual protection when we are attacked.

1. Mutual encouragement when we are weak

...if either of them falls, the one will life up his companion.

It goes like this, in times of personal failure, when times are tough and when it becomes easy to stumble or mess up, we need a companion to keep us from getting to bruised and bloody, That is why I mentioned above about having a group of God loving men by my side would be so cool. They'd watch out for me. If I slip up and make a mistake, I would have someone to encourage me not to do that again.

Here is quote from David W. Smith that express the feeling many of us understand. When I read through this last night, I thought...this is so perfect.

"Within each man there is a dark castle with a fierce dragon to guard the gate. The castle contains a lonely self, a self most men have suppressed, a self they are afraid to show. Instead they present an armored knight-no one is invited inside the castle. The dragon symbolizes the fears and fantasies of masculinity. When men take the risk and let down the barriers, people respond to one another as whole persons and try to communicate with openness and intimacy. Openness brings with it opportunity for a growing relationship, for a wider range of deeply felt experiences. This is the stuff from which friendships are formulated and sustained."

The one of the most eye opening things to me is when I see a dude be different because of his faith. When I see older men ( dads) who love Jesus and you can tell, it is so encouraging. When guys let their guards down in front of each other it is such a cool experience and it's an experience that I long for. I want to have that group of guys that I can change the world with.

2. Mutual support when we are vulnerable 

Furthermore, if two lie down together they keep warm, but how can one be warm alone?

This is one that got me! I always thought Solomon was talking about laying together in bed..as a married couple. I was wrong again! This isn't just bedtime warmth. We need someone when there are elements that we can't change-when we can't make it hot if it's cold. We can't get warm if everything around us is cold. That's the point. We're exposed. We are unguarded. We're vulnerable. And in that vulnerable state, we need someone to warm us up. To put it this way, it's better to have two than one, because the other person will support us when we'er in a vulnerable spot. Swindoll says it best: "Any time or place where you feel self-conscious and your major battle is "How am I going to make it through this right now?" be reminded of verse 11- you are cold and you need help in keeping warm. Two are better than one.

3. Mutual protection when we are attacked

And if one can overpower him who is alone, two can resist him. A cord of three strands is not quickly torn apart.

We all relate to this. There is an adversary we all fight. He is relentless, determined, and clever. He's also invisible. He's called the devil. Sometimes people who are near to us warn us about the devil's attacks. My mom used to, and my girlfriend did today. I told her this morning that I was thinking about just avoiding this topic, but she convinced me that it was just the devil. in that small example, one plus one equals survival.

Ending on that note, I hope that you were encouraged today that two are better than one. This post was extremely lengthy, and I apologize for that. I had a lot of my heart that I wanted to say and combining that with the words of Swindoll, and the Holy Spirit there was a lot to say and address. Again, one plus one equals survival.